Thursday, November 14 2024
Supreme Court’s Broken Soda Machine Sparks Unprecedented Legal Crisis
In a shocking twist for New York’s esteemed Supreme Judicial Court, the real scandal isn’t escaped convicts or pending cases; it’s the soda machine in the hallway that has once again—brace yourself—stopped working.... Read More
Wednesday, November 6 2024
Wall Street Broker Fired for Dropping Rhymes Instead of Dimes
A stockbroker at Jordan Investments recently got the boot—not for bad trades, but for mixing beats instead of spreadsheets during work hours.... Read More
Wednesday, October 30 2024
Crafting Chaos: The Skunk Gun Crime Wave Strikes NYC
In a strange turn of events, the cost of resin has skyrocketed as criminals craft skunk-shaped guns, an affront to safety and olfactory senses.... Read More
Wednesday, October 16 2024
Gateway Report Editor Mysteriously Missing: What’s Going On Behind the Scenes?
In what can only be described as an incredibly convenient coincidence, Stefan Laurence, one of our beloved editors at The Gateway Report, has disappeared shortly after being publicly called out on-air by none other than news anchor Robert Banks.... Read More
Friday, October 11 2024
Exclusive: Interview with littleskrunkle – The Virtual Trading Kingpin
As the rest of us were scrambling to hold onto imaginary fortunes and licking our digital wounds from the devastating NYFE crash, one figure emerged unscathed—no, richer than ever.... Read More
Tuesday, October 8 2024
Winners and Losers In Stock Market Crash
Today's headlines: Payday Gang Still Runs Free, Major Market Crash, Winners Amongst Losers, Controversial Tv Show Breaks Record & Lawsuit Against Cold Blood Studios. Read More